Editing a particularly difficult document this past week — full of extra words and turgid, academic prose — I was reminded of Elizabeth Swann’s priceless line from the Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. Using the most pretentious dialogue she can muster to confound Jack Sparrow, Swann says, “I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request.”
In other words, “No.”
Which brings me to the topic, once again, of plain language, and to Joseph Kimble’s excellent reminder that the goal of good writing is NOT to showcase how brilliant you are (or by proxy, your client is), but rather to have your reader feel smarter.
With that in mind, what words work better than others? The simpler the better, I say. “Eschew obfuscation,” William Safire would offer, if he were still here to advise us.
Of course, there are always exceptions for emphasis or cadence, but in pursuit of clarity and simplicity, I offer a list below of alternatives that are easier to digest. (I’m sure you have your own to add. If so, let me know!)
Instead of …. | Try … | Instead of … | Try … |
accordingly additional administer advantageous aggregate alter anticipate assist attain communicate compensation comply with component comprise concerning concur consequence consolidate currently customary decrease demonstrate designate desire disseminate elapse employ employment encounter endeavor equivalent exhibit expedite expend expenditure facilitate following formulate forward frequently hence however illustrate impact implement inception indicate indication individual inform initial initiate inquire
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so, therefore more, added, other manage useful, helpful total change expect help reach, become write, tell, talk pay, payment follow, meet part consist of, contain, include about, on, for agree result combine, join now (or delete it!) usual reduce, lower show, prove name, choose want, wish send out, distribute pass use work, job meet, face, run into try equal, the same have, show hasten, speed up spend payment, expense, cost make easier, help after work out, create send often so, therefore but show affect, influence begin, start, carry out beginning, start say, show, suggest sign person tell first begin, start, set up ask |
locate magnitude maintain manner maximum mitigate modify necessitate necessity notwithstanding numerous objective observe obtain occur optimum option parameter participate per annum per year personnel portion possess preferable present previous previously prior to proceed provide provided that purchase receive regarding reimburse remainder represents request respond retain selection semiannually similar to solely specified submit subsequently sufficient terminate transmit transpire utilize visualize
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find size keep, continue, support way most, largest, greatest reduce, manage change require need despite many aim, goal see, watch, follow get happen best choice limit, guideline take part a year a year people, staff part have, own best, better, preferred give earlier, last, past before, earlier before go, go ahead give, send if, but buy get about, on, for repay, pay back rest is, makes up, stands for ask answer, reply keep choice twice a year like only named send, offer later, then enough end, stop send happen use think of, imagine |